It has been a little over two months since Babu passed. It’s been hard, living here with all of her things, but not her. Husband and I have been finding moments of joy and some of bittersweetness. Her birthday is quickly rushing toward me. It is next month. It will be a really hard time…
Tag: caretaking
Woodpeckers and Ancestors in the Garden
The last time I posted about my garden was here: April A-Z: Garden This isn’t a garden blog but talk of the garden fits here. Some times when I feel like I could float away in all the fears and negativity that can surround any person who is a caretaker, this garden anchors me. Not…
Throw Back Thursday: Cartography
I thought about the poem featured in this post the other day. I thought about it the last time I shared passages with her. I thought about how, even when she struggled to remember people she used to be very close with, all she could remember was where they lived. That, and that they were…
The Past and Present
I took a dare I made with myself yesterday and I shared a passage with Babu. The dare was to give it one more try, see if it is as bad as I think it is every time. I started with asking her if she remembered writing in a diary every day and she absolutely…
Throw Back Thursday: The First Post
I have started to comb through the blog, fine tooth style. I plan to archive the archive. I may tweak some things, delete some posts, fix some typos. I’m going through it all, rehashing it, if you will. I’m mining more sense out of this, finding more meaning, identifying more patterns. Perhaps…finding a way to…
A Day in the Life, 2018 and Another Month in 1940: Part Seven
I believe that as a caretaker, there is always room for self doubt. For guilt and being hard on yourself. Sometimes I have to reverse my thinking. I sat with my grandmother tonight during what has become my favorite part of the day, night time pill time. I quickly give her her pills then turn…
A Day in the Life, 2018, and Another Month from 1940: Part Six
Now, night time is when the fun begins. Adam is usually home around five and we spend as much time as we can in the garage. For him, it is his home away from home and for me, it’s the place right next to my garden, and him. Sometimes the house gets oppressive. Sometimes we…
A day in the life, 2018, and Another Month in 1940: Part Five
In the afternoons, Babu does her exercises. She reads the paper. I bring the dog down and she tells me that “she’s getting bigger!” She rests again and gets up and does her exercises again. She places her double sided sheet of instructions that are, of course, in a plastic sheet protector on the table…
A Day in the Life, 2018, and a Month in 1940: Part Four
“Dobre popowoodnew!” as she crawls from the living room after her long nap. I say good afternoon in Polish slowly, and spell it (incorrectly) even slower. She doesn’t reply but keeps making slow progress towards the bathroom. “How are ya feeling?” I ask as cheerfully as possible but I already sense, and brace myself. She…
A Day in the Life, 2018, and a Month in 1940: Part Two
Babu rises and shines again right around 8:30. Ok, now we are back on track. As she takes about 25 minutes in the bathroom I get breakfast started. I should set my alarm in the morning a lot later because at this point I can do this in my sleep. When the door to the…
A Day in the Life, 2018, and a Month in 1940: Part One
There is some dream, some dream about…my garden. I keep walking, taking turns peering around corners, snooze and there’s more. More yard, more rose bushes. It’s both a marvelous snooze dream, like The Secret Garden! and an anxiety dream. There’s more. More work to do. I could have put the snooze cucumber plants here and…
A Hello and a Little Update
Hey everyone. I feel that right away I need to tell you Babu is doing well! 🙂 Yes, I have been away from the blog for a while. Whenever this happens, which some of you long time followers know happens a lot, I feel its tug. When I’m not working on the blog or transcribing…
transcribingmemory 